The last few weeks have been a mishmosh...
I'm feeling simultaneously pulled towards doing creative things (calligraphy and illumination for the SCA, sewing, beadwork), productive things (promoting braids, editing a book, making food/bread/granola/tofu/pickles), and whiling away the time (dicking around on the internet). You can guess which one gives the fastest positive feedback and easiest access... I almost think I need to cut myself off (time for Freedom?) for a specified amount of time each day.
I also want to write, and I think I need a writers group to kick my ass and hold me accountable. I've tried a few times to get something going here in Chicago, but no dice so far. Maybe Craigslist? I dunno...
I'm not Glitching so much anymore, and it doesn't look like the player support position I was hoping for will become a reality. Maybe I'm wrong, I'm not burning any bridges... but I'm not holding my breath, either. It's still an awesome game and I play a few times a week... gimme a holler if you want an invite.
Knitting has mostly been set aside. I have a stalled project that was supposed to be a gift for my sister; I don't know how to get past the problem area and I'm almost ready to rip it out. I have a friend whose done this project twice, maybe she can give me a pep talk through it... I'm finishing up another Noro silk scarf for the fellow who helped Clay out so much this summer in France, mostly made while plowing through the first four seasons of Breaking Bad. I can't believe I love this show as much as I do! And I have a couple of skeins of Christmas yarn waiting in the wings... with the cooler weather, running wool through my fingers doesn't sound bad at all.
Gluten-free eating has been working really well for me, but the drawback is that when I DO choose to indulge in something with wheat, whoooeee do I pay for it... I feel bloated and stiff for the whole day following, as well as heavily brain-fogged and sleepy. I'm experimenting with some different gluten-free flours, but it's hard... they are SO expensive, and I can't really do what I did with sourdough, which was just make a loaf a day and change little things until I got it right. But thankfully I've found a source for Udi's GF bread, so I can have a bit of cinnamon toast or a poached egg with everyone else. I'm still baking the sourdough for everyone else, and I think I have the white sandwich bread recipe down pretty well. I love making it, I just can't eat it.
I'm dealing with another stress fracture, this one is the fourth metatarsal of the right foot. We helped two friends move two weeks ago, with lots of stairs and heavy things and moving quickly, and I think that may have done it. Eh, it's not debilitating, just annoying.
(POTENTIAL TMI WARNING FOR THE NEXT TWO PARAGRAPHS... FEEL FREE TO SKIP!)
But that's not the big medical challenge of my life right now. A few days after helping our friends move, I noticed a kind of twingy feeling down there. It didn't feel like a bladder infection (I've had enough of those to know the warning signals... or so I thought), but I went ahead and slammed the cranberry juice and Cranactin just in case. It slowly turned into a pinchy feeling at the end of urination, along the urethra, and it felt like it was going lower and lower... I wondered if I was passing a kidney stone. So I kept hammering on the water as well as the cranberry, and took ibuprofen for when it was really throbby. It never really did the burning thing, though, so I still wasn't thinking bladder infection. Some kind of vaginal atrophy from menopause? Apparently that can show up as urethral pain... but I didn't know for sure. Then, two nights ago, the tight pinchy feeling got worse, and didn't go away after peeing. By 1 a.m., I couldn't sleep even with a ton of ibuprofen in me, and I finally let Bill take me to the local E.R. The sadists there told me NOT to take any more ibuprofen, but wouldn't give me anything for the pain either. I didn't know if it was a huge stuck jagged stone, an infection, an injury, or what... but after a few excruciating hours in the waiting room (where I could not even sit down), we finally poked them and asked for something, ANYTHING, for the pain. They finally took me back, confirmed a bladder infection (!!??!!) and gave me a course of Cipro (an antibiotic) and pyridine, (a dye that is also an analgesic for the urinary tract), but since it wouldn't kick in for a few more hours, they gave me a Norco (hydrocodone and acetaminophen, I think). An hour after that (about 4 a.m., I think), the throbbing and pain backed down enough that I could sleep. Two days later, there is still a bit of discomfort and I'm pretty nervous about a relapse, but now I know what it feels like and won't let it get so bad again. I've never had a UTI present like that before, though, and am wondering if any of you have dealt with it. I have no idea where it came from, there's nothing wrong with the neighboring area except perhaps some itchiness that might be an artifact of menopause or even more fun, another patch of psoriasis.
The Cipro packaging says not to eat yogurt with it. Argh! I haven't had abx since my impacted wisdom teeth got infected, just before I had the little darlings yanked back in Kansas City. I definitely feel wrung out and funky, and while of course I will finish the entire course prescribed... I'm looking forward to getting my poor gut repopulated and happy again. But the bright orange pee has been kinda fun.
I've also visited with a doctor who confirmed a diagnosis of fibromyalgia, but that's kind of another whole post in itself...
DePaul started up last week, so Bill, Cord and Clay are gone all day. It's been kinda nice just having me and Linc on our own lately. Linc and I are doing an ASL class together, he's playing in a homeschool soccer league, and he's trying out a circus class tomorrow. He's drawing a few comic books ("Swordsman Jack"), playing Minecraft, building a bit with Legos, and reading like crazy. There's a teachers' strike going on in Chicago, so we're also playing more with our school friends. We headed to the library the other day, and they had a couple of rooms all set up with boardgames that were totally empty. A brother and sister showed up after a few rounds of Uno, and we all played Trouble, Jenga, chess, Connect 4, and an epic game of Monopoly.
I slipped into Worldcon for a party with the lovely elisem, and got to see shinies and hear some ukelele music and listen to some wonderful stories.
I think I'm moving towards doing some ritual circle work, real honest deep stuff, with someone who is seriously good at it... and I'm feeling simultaneously thrilled and totally starstruck about the prospect. I need to get over it, because I really really don't want to screw up this opportunity.
Life with all boys has been taking a toll. I am feeling a VERY strong need to create my own space. I will be building a few garden boxes to plant kale and herbs in over the next weekend, and if it goes well, I will use my increased woodworking confidence to build a few temporary walls for the basement and asking Clay to move down there with Cordell. They already share the bathroom down there, and the xbox/wii set-up is there too, so I think this might work out well... then I could use the upstairs bedroom for sewing, beading, writing, drawing, calligraphy, yoga, meditation... wish me luck!
As for now... gotta go check on my chocolate frozen yogurt. Yeah, yeah, I'm just a rebel.